Horsemen shrug off holes, hope to carry momentum into Battle of TC Jester

The Horsemen won another home opener – their 6th in a row – while extending their streak against Legs With Holes to 3 games, the last two by 25 points apiece. This one wasn’t nearly as close as the final score would indicate.

After Legs left Tyreek Hill’s 18 on the bench in favor of Demaryius Thomas, first blood would be shed early in the noon games as the Steelers D would block a punt and recover it in the end zone. From there the Horsemen never looked back, taking a 99-45 lead going into Monday night behind Big Ben, Antonio & the Steelers defense.

Despite lackluster games by Le’Veon Bell and Julio Jones, Legs would never get within striking distance. Entering Monday night they were so so convinced a loss was coming – they didn’t even add a kicker. Even after closing in with 2 touchdowns from Diggs (an acquisition from the Horsemen in the offseason) in the first half of the first game – they didn’t add a kicker. It was 107 to 76 going into the late Monday night game, well within reach if Demaryius could pull off a Diggs and get a few points from a kicker – they didn’t add a kicker.

Call it poor strategy, negligence, overconfidence or hopelessness… either way is was really bad. This is what we have come to expect from Teddy and his floundering Legs With Holes.

Week 2 brings a more challenging foe, and one that likely will start a player at all positions and one that features the top two teams in the league. The Horsemen have built a significant lead in the series, and come into 2017 with an 8-4 head to head lead and 4 straight years of possession of the JW Memorial Trophy for the victor of the Battle of TC Jester. Their last meeting, the second straight year of ousting them from the playoffs, was an embarrassing 39 point loss behind a historic performance by Le’Veon Bell.

 

Year	Week	Horsemen	Nosebleeds	W/L	Mgn
2012	4	109	97	W	12
2012	13	91	108	L	-17
2013	4	119	96	W	23
2013	13	87	92	L	-5
2014	4	110	91	W	19
2014	13	118	134	L	-16
2015	2	113	67	W	46
2015	13	139	79	W	60
2015	14	95	84	W	11
2016	2	89	73	W	16
2016	13	95	129	L	-34
2016	14	127	88	W	39

This year sees a few additions to the classic rivalry matchup. The Horsemen debut their prized offseason acquisition, Michael Thomas – while the Nosebleeds, too, have brought in some fireworks in a trade scalping of Drunken Aces that would send them the best tight end in the game, Rob Gronkowski. It will also feature the return of Adrian Peterson for the ‘bleeds, who missed most of last year with injuries, and the Horsemen will debut Jameis Winston – their 2nd QB on the roster, both of which began their stints on the squad after being dropped by Legs With Holes.

The Nosebleeds would also burn a waiver claim to pick up a defense no one else intended on picking up, The Cincinnati Bengals. Some might say it doesn’t make sense to draft the Broncos D/ST so high if you’re going to stream defenses, and they would be right. The Horsemen would pick up the Ravens after waivers cleared, a defense they were targeting well ahead of the Bengals.

Extreme Baby Throwers owe the Horsemen a $2 scratch off if the Broncos outscore the Bengals.

Fortunately, the roster acquisitions still lend to the Horsemen leaving victorious. A victory that would give them six straight victories in the series opener in the six years of the Cosmopolitan Outlaw League. ESPN gives the Horsemen a 66.5% chance of victory.

The Battle of TC Jester agreement was extended for the 2017, whereby a sweep winner will receiver a percentage of the 2018 league entry fee based on point margin of victory – 25 total points in margin would bring 25% of the entry fee.

Last week’s picks went 0-4, which is an accomplishment in itself.

This week…

• The Baby Throwers will upset the Closet Hillbilly in their first game without David Johnson.
• The Drunken Aces will win their first game and send 3rd and Unpredictable to 0-2.
• Legs With Holes will continue losing games, and will fall to Strictly Southern – with or without a kicker.
• Bumpy’s Berries will have a big bounce back and crush Straight Laced.