Horsemen score 100 in four straight, demolish Unpredictable

The Electric Horsemen continued to gather momentum in week 7, steamrolling one of the many uncompetitive teams in the league and improving to 6-1. In a season that has seen 4 of the worst 7 teams of all time the Horsemen are an outlier with the 5th most points in history through 7 weeks.

Since their week 3 embarrassment at the hands of the Drunken Aces, the Horsemen have scored over 100 in each matchup – tying their record for consecutive 100 point performances with four.

3rd and Unpredictable are now in good company at the back end of the standings. While not technically eliminated, the Nosebleeds, Drunken Aces and Legs With Holes all sit at 2-5 and are basically just battling to avoid a bar tab – no team with 2 or less wins through 7 weeks has ever made the playoffs.

The sharp move to bait Unpredictable into picking up Dan Bailey proved extremely effective.

Week 8 brings the rematch of a brutal week 4 slaughter that saw the Extreme Baby Throwers fall by 69 which, believe it or not, was their second worst loss of the season. Incredibly, they only have 2 losses on the year and the other one was by 70.

A surprise victory in week 7 over Straight Laced keeps XBT firmly in the playoff picture despite their terribly inconsistent play. Their one game edge over Strictly Southern and Bumpy’s Berries is a slim one, and while they own the tiebreaker over Bumpy’s Berries, the next two weeks are crucial to maintaining their lead.

The Horsemen will be without #1 ranked running back, Todd Gurley, who is on bye – and also have a questionable designation from their third wide receiver, Michael Thomas. Lamar Miller takes the start in place of Gurley, but if Thomas can’t go the flex position becomes a complete wild card. Marlon Mack, Jalen Richard and Dwayne Washington are competing for the potential start and none are entirely trustworthy options.

The depth issues arise due to the blockbuster trade on Wednesday made with Straight Laced that would send away Chris Hogan, Latavius Murray and Kyle Rudolph for Zach Ertz and a 3rd round pick. Much ado was made about the trade by Legs With Holes – a team that has historically had no clue how to actually value players.

The Baby Throwers will be without Ty Montgomery, but this is probably a good thing. He’s barely been worth rostering since week 2.

They will likely need to score more than 100 points to squeeze out a win in this one, a feat accomplished only once so far this year. They sit in the bottom half of the league in scoring with 88.1 PPG and haven’t even broken 85 since their 127 point week 3 explosion.

The Horsemen have not scored under 86 this season.

The 2017 debut of Ertz will hopefully be an improvement of his previous history with the Horsemen. He is already 3rd on the list of top scoring tight ends for the franchise behind Eifert and Aaron Hernandez (may he rest in peace) despite only averaging 5.13 PPG in his 8 starts.

We expect this go around to be much different. And this victory over XBT will send them into a tailspin that will lead to their eventual elimination from playoff contention.

The Horsemen are favored by 23 points, the largest spread since week 1, and have a staggering 82.3% chance of victory.

Another 2-2 week of picks brings the total to 12-16.

• Closet Hillbilly‘s 3-4 record is misleading, they are a truly awful franchise. 3rd and Unpredictable rolls over them unchallenged.
• Despite resisting any change to their overdrafted QB and D/ST who aren’t even top 10 in their positions, Nosebleeds will defeat the Drunken Aces handily.
• Legs With Holes might as well forfeit to Bumpy’s Berries now.
• In the only game with true playoff implications and between the two teams to never make the playoffs, Chris Hogan will lead Straight Laced to victory over Strictly Southern.